![](https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/Final-Dr.-C-logo-9-1-e1702516465744.png)
Fair-Fighting Rules
We all know that in relationships, conflicts are like those unexpected speed bumps on a smooth road. How you handle these bumps can make your bonds even stronger. Dive into the nitty-gritty of healthy disagreements with this article on fair fighting rules. These guidelines spill the beans on engaging in respectful arguments, setting those all-important boundaries, fostering understanding, and promoting mutual respect.
The Love Language Quiz
Knowing what our love language is important in our adult relationships. It’s like the secret code to your heart AND a secret code to your child’s heart. Love languages may change but keeping tabs on how our child prefers to receive love is helpful for our being able to give them the love they need to feel secure with us. Take this thoughtful love language quiz and embark on a journey of self-discovery. Your honest answers will uncover not just how you express love but also reveal intriguing insights into your personality
Reunification Therapy for Children With a Domestic Abuser?
By Lisa Fontes, PhD & Christine Cocchiola, DSW, LCSW
Coercive Control
Peer Reviewed Articles
– Barnett, O. W. (2000). Why battered women do not leave, part 1: External inhibiting factors within society. *Trauma, Violence, & Abuse, 1*(4), 343-372. [https://doi.org/10.1177/1524838000001004003](https://doi.org/10.1177/1524838000001004003).
– Boland, S., & Brassard, M. R. (2011). Psychological maltreatment of children and youth. In J. E. B. Myers (Ed.), *The APSAC Handbook on Child Maltreatment* (3rd ed., pp. 3-24). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publishing.
– Brassard, M. R., & Donovan, K. L. (2006). Defining psychological maltreatment. In M. M. Feerick, J. F. Knutson, P. K. Trickett, & S. M. Flanzer (Eds.), *Child abuse and neglect: Definitions, classifications, and a framework for research* (pp. 3-27). Baltimore, MD: Paul H Brookes Publishing Co Inc.
– Buel, S. (n.d.). 50 obstacles to leaving. Retrieved from [https://www.thehotline.org/resources/get-help-50-obstacles-to-leaving/](https://www.thehotline.org/resources/get-help-50-obstacles-to-leaving/).
– Cattagni Kleiner, A., & Romain-Glassey, N. (2018). How the current management of intimate partner violence can endanger victimized mothers and their children. *Violence Against Women, 24*(2), 200-223.
– Child Abuse Review. (2010). *Vol. 19: 5-20*. Published online 14 October 2009 in Wiley InterScience. [https://doi.org/10.1002/car.1084](https://doi.org/10.1002/car.1084).
– Ciurria, M. (2018). The loss of autonomy in abused persons: Psychological, moral, and legal dimensions. *Humanities, 7*(2), 1-19. [https://doi.org/10.3390/h7020048](https://doi.org/10.3390/h7020048).
– Coulter, M. L., & Mercado-Crespo, M. C. (2015). Co-occurrence of intimate partner violence and child maltreatment: Service providers’ perceptions. *Journal of Family Violence, 30*(2), 255–262. [https://doi.org/10.1007/s10896-014-9667-5](https://doi.org/10.1007/s10896-014-9667-5).
– Flood, M. (2012). Separated fathers and the ‘fathers’ rights’ movement. *Journal of Family Studies, 18*(2-3), 235-345. [https://doi.org/10.5172/jfs.2012.18.2-3.235](https://doi.org/10.5172/jfs.2012.18.2-3.235).
– Fontes, L. (2015). *Invisible chains: Overcoming coercive control in your intimate relationship*. New York, NY: Guilford Press.
– Friedman, M. (2003). *Autonomy, gender, politics*. Oxford: Oxford University Press.
– Gardner, R. A. (1992). *True and false accusations of child sex abuse*. Cresskill, NJ: Creative Therapeutics.
– Grey, R. (2023). “Catastrophic”: A qualitative exploration of survivors’ experiences of expert instruction in private law child arrangements proceedings. *Journal of Social Welfare and Family Law, 45*(4), 344-362.
– Hall, C. (2020). Analysis of intimate partner violence testing instruments.
– Hart, S. N., Brassard, M. R., Binggeli, N. J., & Davidson, H. A. (2002). Psychological maltreatment. In J. E. B. Myers, L. A. Berliner, J. N. Briere, C. T. Hendrix, T. A. Reid, & C. A. Jenny (Eds.), *The APSAC Handbook on Child Maltreatment* (pp. 79–104). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications.
– Herman, J. L. (2023). *Truth and repair: How trauma survivors envision justice*. New York, NY: Basic Books.
– Hester, M., & Eriksson, M. (2006). The justice system as an arena for the protection of human rights for women and children experiencing violence and abuse. *Academia.edu*.
– Katz, E., Nikupeteri, A., & Laitinen, M. (2020). When coercive control continues to harm children: Post-separation fathering, stalking, and domestic violence. *Child Abuse Review, 29*, 310–324.
– Katz, E. (2023, October 23). Decoding coercive control with Dr. Emma Katz. From ‘Parental Alienation’ to (Abusers’) Child and Mother Sabotage.
– Lohmann, S., Cowlishaw, S., Ney, L., O’Donnell, M., & Felmingham, K. (2023). The trauma and mental health impacts of coercive control: A systematic review and meta-analysis. *Trauma, Violence, & Abuse*, 1-31.
– Love Language Quiz. (n.d.). [What’s Your Love Language](https://www.proprofs.com/quiz-school/story.php?title=whats-your-love-langugae).
– Meier, J. S. (2020). U.S. child custody outcomes in cases involving parental alienation and abuse allegations: What do the data show? *Journal of Social Welfare and Family Law, 42*(1), 92-105.
– Myhill, A., & Hohl, K. (2016). The “golden thread”: Coercive control and risk assessment for domestic violence. *Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 34*. [https://doi.org/10.1177/0886260516675464](https://doi.org/10.1177/0886260516675464).
– Nicholson, S. B., & Lutz, D. J. (2017). The importance of cognitive dissonance in understanding and treating victims of intimate partner violence. *Journal of Aggression, Maltreatment & Trauma, 26*(5), 475-492.
– Orr, K., Sheeran, N., & Douglas, H. (2023). The psychological impact on mothers who have experienced domestic violence when navigating the family court system: A scoping review. *Psychiatry, Psychology and Law*, 1-12.
– Patriarchy: Theoretical Postulates and Empirical Findings. (2009). *Sociological Bulletin, 58*(2), 253-272.
– Pingley, T. (2018). The impact of witnessing domestic violence on children: A systematic review. *Children and Youth Services Review, 94*, 12-20.
– Price, L. (2014). Critical realist versus mainstream interdisciplinary. *Journal of Critical Realism, 13*(1), 52-76. [https://doi.org/10.1179/1476743013Z.00000000019](https://doi.org/10.1179/1476743013Z.00000000019).
– Rafaeli, E., Bernstein, D. P., & Young, J. (2011). *Schema therapy: Distinctive features*. New York, NY: Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group.
– Renner, L. M., & Slack, K. S. (2006). Intimate partner violence and child maltreatment: Understanding intra- and intergenerational connections. *Child Abuse & Neglect, 30*(6), 599-617. [https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chiabu.2006.01.005](https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chiabu.2006.01.005).
– Romero, A., & Staudenraus, M. (2023). Experiences of intimate partner violence victims: Continued abuses during and after litigation. *Journal of Family Trauma, Child Custody & Child Development*, 1-14.
– Sarkis, S. (2018). *Gaslighting: Recognize manipulative and emotionally abusive people — and break free*. New York, NY: De Capo Lifelong Books.
– Sharma, S. R., Gonda, X., Dome, P., & Tarazi, F. I. (2020). What’s love got to do with it: Role of oxytocin in trauma, attachment and resilience. *Pharmacology & Therapeutics, 214*, 107602. [https://doi.org/10.1016/j.pharmthera.2020.107602](https://doi.org/10.1016/j.pharmthera.2020.107602).
– Sharp-Jeffs, N., Kelly, L., & Klein, R. (2017, February 2). Long journeys toward freedom: The relationship between coercive control and space for action— Measurement and emerging evidence. *Journal of Violence Against Women, 24*(2), 163-185. [https://doi.org/10.1177/1077801216686199](https
://doi.org/10.1177/1077801216686199).
– Silberg, J., & Dallam, S. (2018). Abusers gaining custody in family courts: A case series of overturned decisions. *The Leadership Council on Child Abuse & Interpersonal Violence*.
– Spearman, K. J., Hardesty, J. L., Campbell, J., & Vaughan-Eden, V. (2024). Post-separation abuse: A literature review connecting tactics to harm. *Journal of Family Trauma, Child Custody & Child Development*, 1-13.
– Stark, E. (2007). *Coercive control: How men entrap women in personal life*. New York, NY: Oxford University Press.
– Stark, E. (2012). Re-presenting battered women: Coercive control and the defense of liberty. In *Violence Against Women: Complex Realities and New Issues in a Changing World*. Les Presses de l’Université du Québec. Rutgers School of Public Affairs and Administration. Retrieved from [https://www.stopvaw.org/uploads/evan_stark_article_final_100812.pdf](https://www.stopvaw.org/uploads/evan_stark_article_final_100812.pdf).
– Stark, E. (2021, January). Personal communication [Personal interview].
– Walby, S., & Towers, J. (2018). Untangling the concept of coercive contr“““““““““““`ol: Theorizing domestic violent crime. *British Journal of Criminology, 58*(2), 391-410.
– Weitzman, S. (2001). *Not to people like us: Hidden abuse in upscale marriages*. New York, NY: Basic Books Publishing.
– Young, J. E., Klasko, J. S., & Weishaar, M. E. (2003). *Schema therapy: A practitioner’s guide*. New York: Guilford Press.
– Young, J. E., & Klasko, J. S. (1993). *Reinventing your life*. New York, NY: Penguin Group.
– Young, J. (2012). [Schema Therapy](http://www.schematherapy.com/id73.htm).
– Kerig, P. K. (n.d.). [https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1300/J135v05n02_02](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1300/J135v05n02_02)
– How domestic violence batterers use custody proceedings in family courts to abuse victims, and how courts can put a stop to it. (n.d.). [https://escholarship.org/uc/item/31z272j1](https://escholarship.org/uc/item/31z272j1).
– For the sake of the children: The law, domestic violence and child contact in England by Marianne Hester: https://www.academia.edu/22297817/For_the_sake_of_the_children_The_law_domestic_violence_and_child_contact_in_England?email_work_card=title
– Harsey, S. & Freyd, J.J. (2022) Defamation and DARVO [Editorial]. Journal of Trauma & Dissociation, 23, 481-489, DOI: 10.1080/15299732.2022.2111510 (free access)
– E. Dalgarno, E. Katz, S. Ayeb-Karlsson, A. Barnett, P. Motosi & A. Verma (14 Dec 2023): ‘Swim, swim and die at the beach’: family court and perpetrator induced trauma (CPIT) experiences of mothers in Brazil, Journal of Social Welfare and Family Law, DOI: 10.1080/09649069.2023.2285136- Dixon. L., Hamilton-Giachritsis, C., Browne, K.D. & Ostapuik, E. (2007). The co-occurrence of child and intimate partner maltreatment in the family: Characteristics of the violent perpetrators. Journal of Family Violence, 22, 675-689
Co-Occurrence of Intimate Partner Violence and Child Abuse in Hong Kong Chinese Families. http://www. sagepub.com/journalsPermissions.nav DOI: 10.1177/0886260510369136 http://jiv.sagepub.com
![](https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/09/1-724x1024.png)
![](https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/09/2-724x1024.png)
![](https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/font-banner-6-1024x174.png)